Emotion-triggering shit

Dear S,

I’ve been training (forcing) myself to be rational recently. This Wednesday, when I was attending English course at school, the teacher told us to discuss: Is progress always good? Is that important to preserve the tradition? And she asked me to deliver my opinion to the class.

I answered: Yes, I think progress is always good, and it is not important to preserve the tradition. As “preserve” is a verb – to preserve – it refers to an action and implies one try to keep something from washing out intentionally. I don’t agree with such act. What should stay would always remain. If things are really right, they will not vanish. Identities won’t change; equations won’t change, because they are correct.

Soon, another classmate had also answered the same question. She (I don’t remember who exactly she was actually) said something like traditions should be kept and passed on; they are valuable because they have existed for long; it would be bad if they fade out, etc.

If that was a debate, I would surely have won. The other has no logic at all. But anyway it wasn’t a debate. I bet most people in the classroom would stand on her side if they had to choose whose answer’s better. The reason is very simple: mine sounded cold and hers sounded warm.

Such speeches are everywhere. Once I saw an article on the internet written by a Chinese professor, who used to teach in The Hong Kong Chinese University, and later on migrated or something like that. Twenty years later, when he returned, he said the “humanity atmosphere” of the university has gone, and he thought the educational system was responsible to this. He said, universities nowadays pushed students too hard, and wanted them to return the knowledge to the society too much. He explained his point by saying something like: Education was all about giving. Given that it is about giving; we should not demand the students to give back something in return.

Very touching. I stared at this sentence for a couple seconds. Then, I showed it to my friend beside, and asked if he agree with it or not. He frowned, and asked me who said so. I told him he’s a professor. He immediately replied, “A professor! Tell him to become a volunteer, and teach in the university without receiving his salary!”

Then, he asked if I agree with the statement or not. I hesitated to answer, and told him that  I feel it’s right. (I haven’t convinced myself yet) He asked why, and I said because it sounded noble. He instantly criticized me that “it is very irrational”. I agreed. It is irrational indeed.

S, me myself shall stop saying and agreeing to such emotion-triggering yet illogical words. When I promise so to myself, I immediately thought of you. For some unknown reasons, I would rather like to see you saying irrational, stupid, and Cliché shit; while I act like a cold-blooded philosopher. I don’t know why. I really don’t. I realize that I could never be a ‘rational person’ as well as you still occupy some room in my mind.