正確態度

塞翁失馬的故事無人不曉，只是多半人都誤解其寓意。

先是失而復得，再是因福得禍，我們可以用一句話來總結故事：禍兮，福之所倚；福兮，禍之所伏。既然是相互依伏，福與禍本來便無主次之分。因此，假如是正確地引用故事，無論是說「塞翁失馬，焉知非福」、還是「塞翁得馬，焉知非禍」，也不會影響對觀點的佐證。

奢侈

向來不善時間管理，近兩星期時間浪費得特別多。腦子裡不斷想起《創世紀》裡的角色霍景良一句劇中對白：「同你地食呢餐飯真係奢侈。唔係錢，係我嘅時間。」

「時間是寶貴的。」我的天，為何我每晚都要問一次：時間到哪兒去了？

其實我很清楚，時間是到哪兒去了的。我常自覺有一股強烈的需要去散步。早上起來要走一走；吃飽飯要走一走；下課後要走一走；無端白事也要走一走。

The same question

To begin with, the question is: what am I living for?

It appears that most people can manage to avoid answering this question and feel good with it, by simply admitting that this is a deep and philosophical problem. I can’t.

Was preparing for my final speech in the English public speaking course. I'd to do a five-minute-persuasive-speech, and I can choose my own topic. I'd rather the topic was fixed. Thinking of one was killing me. It reminded me of this question again.

I could have said something like, why shouldn’t one believe in horoscope, or why shouldn’t you love and waste money on diamonds. But I'd not like to say so. I'd like to talk something that can represent myself, something that spreads my belief or thinking.

As a direct result of this insistence, I spent the whole Friday, despite there were tons of other works, sitting in front of a blank Microsoft Word screen and sat for the 8 hours; the second day a couple hours. But it was still blank. My only idea is stories.

And yes, finally I decided to talk about stories. Who could think of that! Stories is now something that can represent me the most, which is the only topic that I can look for a persuasive speech.

I’m not actually too proud of it. lol.

Week 88

L:

上課時間剩下不到一個月，時間過得真快。

這段日子，感覺跟世界脫節。我也停滯不前一段時間了，來到這來後，彷彿連最後一點向前走的路都消失了。每次停滯不前，就是悔恨過去。我想我這輩子也得靠兩、三年前的遺憾發財。

明早起來又是11月28日（見到個日期個心都離一離）。每逢特別日子，也得反思今天的一舉一動，是因何事而發生，然後便會從已知的史實中，發現新的事實。

繼續落葉

從九月尾遇見第一片落葉起，近兩個月就是不停講落葉。

在上海，真正落葉紛紛的日子到了。還是第一次親眼看見，兩旁種滿樹的大直路，全部樹冠都染成黃色；風一吹，大堆傾洩，像撕成碎片的牛皮紙，實在壯觀，但不及想像中浪漫，因為葉子掉得太快。

不斷講落葉，自己也悶。今個星期定下作品集的框架，有翻譯、有寫作，加起約有10篇，但真正完工的，只有3篇，都是譯作，還得努力趕工。

觀察能力差

很多人說，多留意別人對自己的意見和評論，可以更加了解自己。「言者無罪，聞者足戒」，一般人這樣說，多半也指自己的短處或不足；但我相信別人的讚賞也很有價值的，因為有時做了好事，自己都不知道是否真的正確，別人的肯定，令人更有信心朝這方向走下去。

普遍人對我的評價，我可以說是略知一二，也可以說只知道冰山一角。有一點可真有趣，我在不同圈子，別人對我觀察力的意見非常極端。

跟我同齡的人，普遍覺得我總是忽略細節，看不透別人心意，又聽不出弦外之音。相熟的中學同學，常笑我「觀察能力差」，我的確多番在他們面前，錯過了許多近在眼前的事。

Memory Trial

I know a friend. He said he’d a diary at his bedside. Not really a diary; it’s a notebook for recording dreams. Sweet dreams or nightmare, written once it’s over.

That’s a good idea. Dreams - they fade away too fast. But I was never in the mood of writing the moment I wake up. So tiring. So I left it for the diary, that turns out I forgot all the details at the evening. And at the first place, some were already forgotten the moment I got up. Recordings in the diary are never the most sophisticated ones. But they passed the memory trial.

Many wonders why spans of historical figures and duration of events in the Bible are so neat – all are multiples of five or ten; so as I ask myself why the recording of dreams in my diary are so logical, for the dream I had last night, like all the others, was just a mixture of random people and scenes.

The mystery lies within the memory trial.