For C – with love and anger

C:

First time writing to you here. You existed longer than S, and I’m mad with that being at the moment.

I Drew this week. I love drawing, or more accurately, doodling. I’m not as prolific as I imagined. Few months with no new ideas, and I suddenly got a few this week. A reason for not being prolific is that besides of a drawing, I need a small paragraph of a sort of very simple informal and random tiny poem. I wanted to upload the doodle too but not until this moment I found that I haven’t taken a picture of it yet. And it’s getting late (3:44), so I’m too lazy to do it. Sorry that I could only recap the small paragraph of thing I wrote:

 

For you –

with and without fidelity,

let me devote my ecstasy.

Surrendered to haughtiness,

not so cute but cantankerous.

As because since by virtue of,

considering on behalf that,

due to in view of whereas…

Love me for no reason.

As you can see I didn’t do many decorations on the expressions, so my true emotion could be fully expressed. I don’t usually do so, but as I didn’t draw and write for months, there were a lot of references in the paragraph. I can make a few notes here:

The first sentence is obviously a sample of the story I’ve mentioned above; fidelity, ecstasy, and haughtiness are frequently appeared and also quite important ideas in the novel Love in the Time of Cholera; haughty, cantankerous, and the last line of the first paragraph are all sampled from the lyrics of Scenario Rock – Perfect Love Antidote. (You can’t find the lyrics of the song easily. It’s too rare. I’ve uploaded the lyrics in an earlier post. You may have a look)

Perhaps most importantly, it is the last sentence. Love me for no reason. This thought came up to my mind a few days ago, when I suddenly remembered a random guy commented, “like my comment for no reason” on a 9Gag’s post. Love me for no reason. This is sort of romantic. If I’m trying to be rational, something irrational would be romantic, especially when I find myself no reason to be loved.

Seeing your recent pictures reminded me of the past. I finally feel like it’s time to get rid of S. S is Cholera. I’m mad with S. See you.